Six months ago, when we were back in the States thinking about our move to Costa Rica, we knew we would be faced with language challenges. Tabatha had been studying Spanish for only a couple of months, and although I had been studying for a couple of years, I was still only a beginner. There was no way for us to know what it would be like.

It didn’t take long for us to find out. From the moment we stepped out of the plane, Spanish was everywhere.

We read all kinds of reassurances online about how we didn’t have to worry about not knowing how to speak Spanish because you can always just use Google Translate. Google Translate is great! It quickly became our best friend. It helps us translate signs, grocery store labels, ingredients, and product descriptions. It helps us figure out how to ask for what we want or need, and if our pronunciation is so bad that we get confused looks, it will even speak for us.

I found that to be very useful one day when I asked a grocery store clerk where I could find yeast. The Spanish word for yeast is “levadura.” It’s pronounced leh-vah-doo-rah. Now, I thought that’s how I pronounced it, but apparently I pronounced it “lav-ah-dor-ah.” The clerk was quite confused. You see, “lavadora” is the Spanish word for a washing machine. He might have thought, “Why the heck is she looking for a washing machine in a grocery store?”

I have found another Spanish word that can get you misunderstood if you fail to pronounce it precisely. The word for hair is “cabello,” pronounced “kah-bay-yoh.” It’s very easy to mistakenly pronounce it “kah-bye-yoh.” You might think you’re asking the hairdresser to wash your hair, but what you’re really asking her to do is wash your horse (caballo).

Google Translate also has this wonderful feature called “Conversation” that can automatically translate between two people. Theoretically, that is. If you’ve ever heard a native Spanish speaker, you know that they seem to speak very fast. That’s because the words flow into each other, making it difficult to pick out the individual words unless you have a trained ear. You can ask the person, “Por favor, hable más despacio” (speak more slowly please), but I’ve found that most can’t because it’s just not natural for them. Google’s “ear” may be better trained than mine, but it is still no match for my next-door neighbor’s or the handyman’s thoroughbred pace.

Google also does not translate local slang accurately, so the translation doesn’t always make sense. For example, in Costa Rica, there’s the saying, “¡Que torta!” It means, “What a mess!” A Costa Rican “torta” is like an omelet or a quiche – a mess of ingredients thrown together and then cooked. Google translates “¡Que torta!” as “What a cake!” According to my Costa Rican Spanish teacher, the word for cake is “queque,” which Google translates as “what what.” Another Costa Rican saying is “¡Que chicha!” This is an expression of anger that often follows an unexpected and unwelcome surprise. Google translates that as “What a girl!”

“¡Que torta!”

We read all kinds of reassurances online about how we don’t have to worry about not knowing how to speak Spanish because many Costa Ricans speak English, and they will often switch from Spanish to English if it appears you are struggling to understand. We’ve been here over a month, and I can count the number of times that has happened on the fingers of one hand. It has happened most often with key service providers such as doctors, lawyers, and bankers. I learned not to bother asking the guy behind the meat counter “¿Habla usted inglés?” (Do you speak English?). No, I’ve learned how to say, “Quisiera un kilo de carne molida por favor” (I’d like a kilo of ground beef please).

There are more bilinguals in tourist areas, but we are not living on the beach. We are living in the Central Valley in the city of San Ramón. Here, it seems, most people don’t speak English even though Costa Ricans learn English in school. I learned French in school. Guess how much French I remember today? The other day, my neighbor introduced her eleven-year-old “nieto” to me. When I looked confused, the kid said, “grandson.”

Yes, Costa Ricans learn English in school, but just like with the French I learned, if you don’t use it, you lose it. Some do remember a little bit of English from school, and they like to use it. Occasionally, we say “Buenos días” to someone on the street, and we get a “Good morning!” in response. And sometimes, we get a “thank you” in response. We can’t help but grin. We all love to hear our own language – even if it isn’t quite right.

I guess we can’t hide it. We are obviously English-speaking gringos. But we are living in a Spanish-speaking country now, so I feel it is my responsibility to learn how to speak the language. The Spanish phrase that comes out of my mouth most frequently is an apology: “Lo siento. Mi español no es muy bueno” (I’m sorry. My Spanish isn’t very good).

There are many other English-speakers who live here, some for many years, who haven’t bothered to learn Spanish. I don’t blame them. It takes a ton of time and hard work. I believe that not knowing the language puts you at a serious disadvantage, and I’m not willing to accept living that way. Admittedly, the choice to learn was easy for me because I’m a language geek. Tabatha isn’t, but she has become fascinated by the structure of the Spanish langue.

When I first got here, I was afraid to try to communicate in Spanish. When listening, I was so focused on translating the words that I would miss the obvious meaning from the context and the person’s body language. Tabatha was much better at this because she didn’t even try to translate the words. When speaking, I was too afraid of making mistakes: using the wrong part of speech or conjugating a verb incorrectly.

I was too focused on vocabulary and grammar. Yes, being a language geek was getting in my way. I’m now finding that I can speak Spanish better than I think. Many people have said, “Habla usted español muy bien” (You speak Spanish very well). Of course, taking Spanish classes four days a week for the past month has helped a lot! There are times when I feel great – like “Yeah, I can do this! Look at me! I’m speaking Spanish!”

Still there are also plenty of times when I fall flat on my face. I feel dumb – a lot. Many times, all I can say at the end of a conversation is, “Gracias por su paciencia” (Thank you for your patience).

People are people wherever you go. Some are more patient than others, but I’d have to say most people here are patient and really appreciate people’s attempts to speak their language. I think my fears of their impatience and intolerance are mostly in my head. It takes a lot longer to communicate here. Perhaps I’m projecting my own impatience and intolerance onto them. Yes, I’m the one who is impatient and too hard on myself.

Truly, I have never experienced anything more humbling.

Next Post: The Not-So-Good Stuff

We arrived in Costa Rica on March 21, 2023 early in the morning on a beautiful day and began our new lives in a country we have never visited – not even once. We anticipated that we would experience a culture different from that of the United States, but we couldn’t have imagined what it would be like. Now that we have been here for over three weeks, we are beginning to get a taste of culture shock . In some ways it has been bitter and in other ways sweet.

I will start with the bitter. First of all, in Costa Rica, the traffic is horrible. We chose not to drive in Costa Rica, and we are so glad we made that choice. We hired drivers for two trips from San Ramón to San José and back, and both times, the hour-long drive took more than two hours. On the second trip, the driver attempted to avoid the traffic by taking death-defying cliff-hanging back roads that made us seriously doubt if we would survive. The reward for our near heart failure was that we got to see some fantastic views. We certainly didn’t get to San Ramón any faster.

Second, I thought the sidewalks in Easton, PA were bad. Not compared to the sidewalks in San Ramón. You need to pay attention when walking, or you could easily step into one of many holes, trip over a sudden rise or fall in the sidewalk, or fall into the deep drainage ditches (our poor dog has done that a few times). Just today, while walking downtown, I looked over the edge of the sidewalk, and there must have been a four-foot drop onto the street. I felt like I was walking along a cliff with no railing. In Easton, I saw people with disabilities riding around in powered wheelchairs or scooters all the time. I haven’t seen anyone doing that here. They would have to be loco.

Why are Costa Rica’s roads and sidewalks so bad? Because they don’t prioritize infrastructure issues. They expect people to be aware of traffic and infrastructure issues, take responsibility, and act like rational adults. Costa Rica spends most of its money on three things: education, social services, and healthcare. Knowing this, I can forgive the horrible traffic and horrendous sidewalks.

Now for the sweet. The park is always full of people of all ages enjoying recreational activities, whether they are working out with the provided fitness equipment, walking or running around the field, playing on the playground, or playing a game on the basketball court or soccer field. Their faces are all brimming with sheer pleasure and relaxing enjoyment. Whenever I saw the few people in U.S. parks engaging in recreational activities, they didn’t appear to be enjoying it so much. They appear to be trying get fit for some big event or engaging in serious competition. That kind of pressure doesn’t seem to exist in Costa Rica. Apparently, it isn’t necessary. Costa Ricans are generally healthy and fit.

Some of the conveniences I enjoyed in the U.S. are non-existent here. I wanted to buy a mop with a disposable head – like a Swiffer. No such thing here. The way you mop in Costa Rica is by clipping a rag to the end of a pole. You wring it out by hand, and if you want it clean, you have to rinse it out or wash it. Why do I consider that sweet? In the U.S. there are many products that make life more convenient, but we don’t think its impact on the environment. For example, when we were living in the U.S., we were using a Brita pitcher, and we had over two dozen filters that we needed to recycle. Unfortunately, the company had dissolved their recycling program, so all those filters sadly ended up going in the trash. Many U.S. companies refuse to take responsibility for recycling the products they sell, and the environment suffers. The Costa Ricans don’t sacrifice the environment for convenience.

The sweetest thing of all is that in Costa Rica, you get treated like a real person who matters. More than once, I received a hug and kiss on the cheek simply for introducing myself. The sincere hospitality and generosity of our neighbors has also been a shock. We are foreigners, but we are treated like friends. Our neighbor has brought us wonderful tortillas and custards and complete plates of food. When there was a water main break, they took care of us, taking us in their car to the water truck and giving us containers so that we could collect water for ourselves. In the U.S., foreigners are treated with cold indifference at best.

In the U.S., when people meet for business purposes, they immediately get down to business. In Costa Rica, before business is conducted, people talk to each other. They actually take the time to check in on each other’s wellbeing and to get to know each other. When they say, “Cómo está usted?” (How are you?), they genuinely want to know how you are. There is about ten minutes of chatting before they actually get down to business. This has been extremely enlightening for me. I didn’t realize this before, but the message we Americans send in getting right down to business is this: “I don’t care who you are. I care only about what you can do for me.”

In America, the focus is on business. In Costa Rica, the focus is on relationships: relationships between people and the relationship between the people and the earth. In America, it’s all about money. In Costa Rica, it’s all about community.

That may be why Costa Ricans are among the happiest people on earth, and we are very happy to be living among them.

Next post: Language Shock